Day Thirteen...Goodbyes are hard

How do you close the door on three years of your life?

You don't. You let go of the control and allow God to do what He needs to do. 

I have to back up to Friday, Sept 9, the day before we left for Guangzhou.

I didn't post about it back then, but we had our "official" goodbye before we left for Guangzhou to pick up Silas. I knew that I didn't want to have the "ugly cries" when he was here because I didn't want to scare him. So we had a night of fellowship with the whole team and then spent some special time with each other that night. 

The boys

The big kids

The best friends that anyone could ever ask for. There are not enough words in the English language to describe the relationship that has grown over the last 5 1/2 years between these four people. As we go back to America, there are two large chunks of our hearts missing...our friends in East Asia and our teammates, who are more than equal to family in our eyes. As we go back to family, we are leaving family behind. Our lives will never be the same. And I thank God every single day for blessing our lives so richly and deeply!

We praise the Father for the new team that He has given. Our two families have been through thick and through thin together, and we all know that nothing will be able to replace that, but God has done an amazing job of PROVIDING!! Our hearts are full knowing that our dear friends will be very well taken care of. He has provided three families (one not pictured) that are so rich in knowledge and experience and love for the Lord. He has provided kids that are so close in age which will yield friendships that will last a lifetime for them. If we have to go, I couldn't ask for a better situation to leave behind. God is so faithful! Please be in prayer for the G family as they adjust to their new home, their new city and their new teammates. Father has very big plans for their next term and we are so excited to see how He will use them for His glory!

From the day we started...

To now...Thank you Father for how you have worked in our lives and grown us together!

Fast forward exactly two weeks to now Day Thirteen. We had such a fun night with our team and we woke up and shared breakfast together and got ready to go. We gave really big hugs before we left the house because we knew things would get crazy at the airport, (which they did) and went on our way. 

One last family picture. Our sweet kids look so grown up!!

One thing I have truly missed about America is my car and the radio. Being able to get in my car and go for a ride and at any time have the Word of God and uplifting music in my ears. We were blessed to have friends that were able to drive us to the airport in their cars. As we rode, we laughed and talked and at first it was just another day. And then all of a sudden, the kids calmed down and it was quiet, and there was the radio. And I heard these words...

"Hold it all together
Everybody needs you strong
But life hits you out of nowhere
And barely leaves you holding on

And when you're tired of fighting
Chained by your control
There's freedom in surrender
Lay it down and let it go"

A song I've heard many times, but in that moment, in the quiet, even though I had been so focused on all the happy of our adoption and all of the good things, the truth was that there is this world of unknowns stretched out before me, and those words cut to my heart and the lump in my throat grew bigger and bigger. I didn't want to cry. Silas was sitting beside me. Justin was in the other car. I had to keep control. 

And then she turned around. The woman in my life who has been my constant. For the last three years she has been by my side. We have walked hand in hand into a battle and have fought tooth and nail to hold each other up through it. We have faced the storms of culture stress and all that includes, of which I could never accurately paint a picture. We have been totally helpless together and in our weakness God's glory has been brilliant. We have been a team in the purest sense of the word. We have laughed, cried, been angry, hurt, forgiven and stronger together. Our hearts have been bound together in a way that I never dreamed could happen. And she turned around. And she gave me that look. And I lost it. 

Fortunately, Silas thought it was hilarious that I was crying and it didn't phase him in the least bit and he gave a much needed sense of humor to the situation.

We are so thankful for these guys that helped us so much with our luggage and so much more! We love you guys!!

We got through the airport craziness and had to say goodbye with lumps in our throats in the rush to security like we had figured would happen. Sean was definitely having a hard time and it showed through complete defiance as we tried to get him to stand in line. Once we were finally through security and at our gate, our boys released their built up sadness and we just let them cry. Even Silas was asking about "big sister" and said he wanted to go back to their house.

We are thankful for friendships that are hard to leave. It means that we have loved well.

And now we just begin the next chapter. God will be with us all through every step of the way.

Thankful for this play area in the Beijing airport while we tried to find some dinner.

 We made it to our hotel, which was amazing and the perfect way to spend our last night in Asia.

We finally got a hotel with a bathtub and Silas got to experience his first bath. He loved it!!!

Stay tuned for our adventure to the Great Wall!!

Days Ten and Eleven

I'm going to make this a short post, because 1. There's not much to write...the past two days have been really low key and 2. I need to get the kids up and ready because we leave Guangzhou TODAY!!!! Finally!! We are so ready for no more hotels. We have 2 more nights before we are actually in a house, but we are moving. Now please pray for us because travelling with these three plus suitcases legitimately terrifies me. haha.

So Wednesday we had our US Consulate appointment. We couldn't take cameras, phones or bags or anything into the Consulate, so I don't have any pictures. But it went faster than we were expecting, the kids were well behaved and it was the last appointment we had before we leave. It's a huge milestone for adoptive families and we are so excited to be there! It's been a long road and so worth it.

Our early morning gave us a beautiful view of the sun coming up over the city with a view of the famous Canton Tower in the background.

The only picture I got from the Consulate.
It was really dark, so it's not a great picture, but you can see our red white and blue!

After our appointment, we were really close to Ikea, so we went over there to look around.

We love Ikea! Especially in China!

 The boys pretending to watch TV and play the Wii on this super comfy couch in Ikea.




Ok so sidenote....Ikea in China is hilarious. It is nothing to walk through the showroom and find people literally sleeping on the beds and couches. Tired? Ready for a nap? Let's go to Ikea!!

We finally got home after a sort of long winded afternoon. We struggled to find somewhere to eat and when we did the lady taking our order wasn't very nice to me and I wasn't very nice to her unfortunately. And then two of the three kids didn't want what I had ordered for them and I wasn't so nice to them.

This is what it looks like when Mommy goes crazy and nobody wants to hold her hand. HA!

So we high tailed it home and bribed the boys to take a nap quickly so that we could go swimming in the afternoon. It worked pretty well and Silas woke up and sat straight up in bed and said let's go! 

I didn't get any pictures of swimming. But we had a great time.

Yesterday, we were hoping to do something fun since it was our last day here, but we were all so worn out that we just couldn't really function out in public. We tried to make it happen. We looked up where we wanted to go to lunch, found it at a mall nearby that was also on the way to the tourist place we wanted to go to and when we got there, the restaurant had moved and wasn't there and Silas wasn't feeling well, so we just decided to go back home and hang out for the afternoon. 

Silas asks for Coke everyday, but I haven't given to him.
So I caved yesterday. His first taste.

It's good!

Sean thinks so too!

 We got Silas's Visa packet today! When he lands in America he will be a US Citizen!

I was supposed to go pick up our laundry and our pictures during naptime, but I got a text message to come pick up his packet. So I'm praying that the laundry place will be open this morning so I can get our clothes and get them packed before we get on a plane today!

My Kung Fu masters

 Silas practicing how to eat pizza the right way!

Silas totally came out of his shell and stripped down to his underwear and danced around tonight. It was totally obvious that he had NEVER done that before. He thought it was hilarious and you could just see that it was a moment for him to be like his brothers.

Now, I am turning the computer off and going to hopefully find my clean clothes and we are headed to the airport!! We are coming!!!

Day Eight

We have been a family for a whole week!! Yay!!!!

We are felt a little better today, but were a little hesitant to go to the orphanage so early without knowing how we would feel. So we talked to our guide and asked if there was a way we could go tomorrow and they said yes. So we rescheduled our visit for then.

We ventured out to the mall across the street for lunch because I had to go to the grocery store and we made a pit stop at a sporting goods store that we love. For real, we come here every time we come to town. The boys had so much fun looking at all the new things and of course we came out with some flashlights and a few other things. I somehow didn't get a picture of QiLong riding this bike, but I did get video, which I will put all together...some day. haha. He was such a natural at riding a bike though. He will be ready for no training wheels in no time. Here is Sean for the first time. He couldn't really reach the peddles just yet, but he was eager!!

Stephen teaching his brother a little about tent camping 

We did almost have a meltdown while we were at the mall. We put the little boys in the stroller while we went to the grocery store. I just had a few things to get and we wanted to get in and out quickly, and otherwise little hands want to touch everything they see which makes the trip turn into way longer. But Silas didn't want to sit in the stroller at that moment for some reason and he began the first stages of a tantrum. So I told him if he didn't want to ride, then I would go home with him and Daddy would get what we needed from the store and asked him if he wanted to go home. He said yes at first and as we started to walk towards the door he changed his mind and decided he wanted to ride. We were so excited and so proud of him for first being able to talk with us and listen to his options and then two for making a decision to control himself. We took that small victory and celebrated big with Starbucks! Ok, that was for Mommy and Daddy. But they liked their cinnamon roll too!

                                      

Praise the Lord, we have had some HUGE progress when it comes to bedtimes. We haven't had ANY tears or fighting during naptime OR bedtime for the last 3 days! Yay!!! It still takes a little bit of work to get them calmed down and still enough that they fall asleep, but I'll take that any day over the middle of the week. We haven't really established a specific routine either. In all honesty, every day has looked different in how we get ready for bed. But we just make sure we talk about bedtime well in advance and don't spring it on him. And the main rule, for Silas and Sean is that we have to be close to Daddy. It's very important. :)                                           

My husband is so great. I can't give him enough credit. He has been so great juggling both of these boys. There are days that he carries both of them across the city it seems like. And they are HEAVY. Up and down stairs, over bridges, anywhere, anytime that one of them needs him, he is there. He is the center of both of their worlds. Silas is attaching very well to both of us. He doesn't cry if Justin's not in the room or anything and he is ok with him leaving. He lets me carry him too and cuddle with him at bedtime. But when Daddy is there he lights up. And he knows he's got him right where he wants him. 

After nap, we went outside to play for a while. I can't stop with the bubble pictures, sorry. 

We found some neat frisbees at the sport store so we showed Silas the ropes. Kid has some skills!!

So the place where we are staying is also famous for its statues. There are statues all over the island depicting the merging of the two cultures, Chinese and Foreigners, together. So we had to join the crowd and take a few pictures.

The most famous statue for adoptive families. My kids are a little older, but it still works! :) 

Silly faces!!

So he has this pose....

Then delivery for dinner and a movie until bedtime!

The boys were cute at bedtime. Sean actually wanted to lay down beside Silas tonight and he gave him lots and lots of kisses. Until we figured out that the kisses were prolonging bedtime, so then we had to switch places. But we were so happy to see him choosing to show Silas specific attention like that!

The cuteness!! It's been so fun and eye opening to watch Silas simply learn about life. Including taking a shower.
And he's picking up some English already too! Just from hearing us talk to each other.

Since we rescheduled our orphanage visit, we will doing that first thing in the morning.

A special prayer request: Silas and Stephen get carsick very easily. He does NOT like riding in the car. We are going to take the subway as far as we can,  but then we still will have a short ride in a taxi to the orphanage. It will make our entire trip about 30-40 min longer, but at least we wont have to worry about the car for that long (Maybe 15 minutes). We have some patches for him that we got from the pharmacy, but I don't know how well they work. (Sometimes I feel like Chinese medicine is all a placebo...) They said that he wasn't old enough to take their medicine and I totally didn't think about packing some Dramamine. 

So we will be there around 10 am our time (9pm CST). Pray for our time there and that Silas will be able to have closure about leaving. He seems excited to introduce us to his friends and teachers and show us around. He has seen many other kids come and go with their families and now it's his turn to show off, so I don't really think there will be any major emotional struggle, but you never know. This could be really hard for him. We are just praying for the best and are so thankful we have the opportunity to see a little bit more of what his life used to look like. 

And then we will have family pictures taken in the afternoon. Pray for a good nap time!!! haha. 

That's a really long day for a little boy!